White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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