He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
