Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Randomize
