We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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