Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
