Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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