We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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