My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Two words: blizzard sex
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
