yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i can't believe i had my finger in that
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Randomize
