I heard we made out
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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