i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
