you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
he high fived his dick after we had sex
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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