I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Randomize
