thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I think I sprained my soul last night
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
