the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Randomize
