i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
