I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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