brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
