You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
He better not be in your backpack
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
