Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
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