Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Randomize
