You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Randomize
