my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
