i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
it's not cheating when I paid for it
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
