trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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