Your tits are I can't wait for
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
