Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
