if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
