whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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