That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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