my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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