is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
only you would photoshop your dick
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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