i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize