You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
