I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Drake has all the answers
Randomize
