"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
