his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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