But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
