you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Randomize
