you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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