his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
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