You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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