Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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