i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Will exercising make me less horny?
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