Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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