Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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