I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Randomize
