just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize