What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize
