just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
